Chunk By Chunk

My grandfather said that a few years ago he started falling apart piece by piece. Now is he falling apart chunk by chunk.

So it seems with Abby.

Abby has been weird lately when it comes to agility. She was refusing her favorite obstacles and has been even slower than normal. Despite my belief that she was just being Abby, it turns out that there are some (more) things wrong with her. On top of her seizures, and her kidney issues, we now have heart murmur, arthritis, and degenerative disc disease to add to the list. I never believed that Abby would be a long-lived dog, but I didn't think that she would fall apart this young either.

When I first saw those X-rays a part of me was relieved. All this recent behavior is not mental. But once I made that realization, my heart sank. It isn't mental, it's physical. This won't get better. We can't train through this. This is permanent. We can no longer do agility.

I never thought that Abby would win titles, but I hoped that we would be able to train and trial and have a ton of fun for years before we retired. But we have to stop now. And it really depresses me. We have spent a whole year doing this. Countless hours training, countless $$ spent, countless hours driving. . . and we don't really have anything to show for it.

Ok, I know that's not entirely true. We learned a lot and Abby has a ton of confidence (a ton considering where she started) but right now I just want to be sad that we have to give up something that we both loved doing.